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16:43 

spoiled brain

.bitch.
how dare you?how dare you remind it everywhere and to everybody?
whore,it's fucking personal relations!!!!!!!!!
if you want somebody to pity you-go ahead,but don't tell it to everybody.
who the fuck gave you the possability to call me by my last name only?
how dare you to say that it was all my fault and you are just so kind and innocent?
how dare you to say it?
like it wasn't your fault.like you don't remember that you've ruined this friendship,because you were so blind and egoistic.
like you don't remember that you were lying to me.
but now you only pity yourself.saying that i broke your life,that you can't trust ppl after what i've done with you.
but who got hurt on me when i said that i can't come every fucking week to another edge of the city?
because yes!i am fucking busy instead of you!i have affairs while you don't have it at all,because you're 2 years younger,you have no idea yet what it's like to finish the school and passing exams in your future university!
goddamn,i have family!i can't spend all my life with you.
who never cared what's been happening to me?never asked about it,but only made me listening to you and pity you?
who couldn't come to my district?how many times you were there?two?three?
hell yeah,that's the heroism.
i don't regret these relations are over now.
i just don't understand 1 thing:why do you ask if i still care how you're doing there,bitches,when you said that you're removing me from your life?why didn't you forget me yet and remind this situation all the time and to everybody?
i didn't want to hate you.i just wanted to 'remove you from my life' as you're saying.but this shit has fucked me up finally.damn you.

you don't know that i have people i honestly need in.
you were one of them.but not now.
i don't care.you can think whatever you want.
that i never needed you,that i don't need anybody,that i'm an egoist or dunno what friendship is.
but if you don't feel this to yourself that doesn't mean that it's truth.it only means that i don't feel it to you.
because ppl i feel it to know about it


23:01 

spoiled brain

YOU'RE BACK?..


22:10 

spoiled brain

Believe the news Im gone for good.

Call off the search. No one will know I am down here

And believe the note I left for you.

You cant turn back the clocks


You cant pull me up from here so dont try.

 

Im in a car underwater with time to kill

Thinking back I forgot to tell you this:

I didnt care that you left and abandoned me.

What hurts more is I would still die for you

Im in a car underwater with time to kill

Thinking back I forgot to tell you this:

I didnt care that you left and abandoned me.

What hurts more is I would still die for you.

 


Make time slower. Give me longer

Its too late for me

No one will know that Im down here

And believe your dreams of me sinking so far below.


You cant pull me up from here so dont try

 

Im in a car underwater with time to kill

Thinking back I forgot to tell you this:

I didnt care that you left and abandoned me

What hurts more is I would still die for you

Im in a car underwater with time to kill

Thinking back I forgot to tell you this:

I didnt care that you left and abandoned me

What hurts more is I would still die for you
(c)Armor For Sleep 'Car Underwater'


21:46 

spoiled brain
it was 1 year ago.
my little happy life.
all i want is just you here,with me,still being a part of my life...no..a part of me.
i love you.
i said i love you and i swear i still do.
no matter how many times i told you that before.
it is still so.

probably you don't care anymore.uh.
[hope,greeny,just hope]

23:42 

spoiled brain

okaaaay.now what?
i was circling poi today.under the rain.yaay,will repeat it in summer.for sure.
i am probably the biggest loser ever,but who cares?
i wanna meet with kat.i wanna meet with kat.i wanna meet with kaaat.
and i want sushi.
and i'm bored outta my mind.
and tomorrow could have been 1 year since we're together.
and i have nothing to write here also.
bored.fucked up.tired.missing
*yawns*need to sleep.honestly need to sleep.

[it's fucking spring.but you're not here with me.and i don't wanna love anyone else.wonderful,isn't?]


22:14 

spoiled brain

i wish
i wish
i wish it was all that easy.


i wish you were here.
i wish ppl even sometimes tried to understand me instead of asking stupid and useless questions.
i wish i never knew some ppl.
i wish i'd never done those things i regret i had.
i wish i could bring you back.
i wish i could remember you forever if you will not back.
i wih i knew what i really need in.
i wish i knew how to love.

i wish
i wish
i wish it was all that easy..


22:59 

spoiled brain
new post?huh.nothing to write here.
nothing at all.
i thought i had a best friend-she is not right now.
i thought i had someone to love.nobody to love now.
i thought it's better to say goodbye.but no goodbyes this time.
i thought ppl keep their promises.i was wrong.
i thought i was happy.and that's the only tuth from all that.
uhhh.what a life?
i have the best friend i could ever wish to have.but what?she's livivng in about 2000km from here.
i have ppl supporting me all the time.but i'm drunk for two days.
alcohol+medicament=amazing feeling of feelin' no pain at all.
[you're so positive,greeny.goddamnyou]


@музыка: MCR_Cancer

10:38 

spoiled brain
weird,but there're more and more ppl i hate with every day.
maybe it's smth wrong with me,maybe otherwise,but i really do not like them.honestly,i hate only one girl,but i doooon't like the others very much.why do they irritate me?how it could've happened that ppl who were very good friends of mine are so disgusting to me right now?
i look through their diaries,though i can't see them,and even their avatars irritate me.gah,what a psycho you are,greeny.
and the more i look back in the past the more these ppl are disgusting to me.but,damn,that's not right.it coldn't be.they were my friends[oh,really?].all i need is just forget what they'd done to me as they've forgotten me.
i.c.a.n.n.o.t.d.o.i.t.
fuckdamn,relax,gb.all's gonna be fine[it still hurts].
i'm talking to myself?aaaahhh*runs away and hides under the table in the kitchen*

15:20 

spoiled brain
finally,finally,finally.greeny bastard is free from all these secrets,intrigues and hatred.no more hiding.i can be..just myself...[unbelievable feeling]
new life's begun and greeny is happy.at least for now.

.fever.

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